Fatty Got Strawberries In The Third Flap

Hello, my name is Dane and this is my blog about fatties.

Sometimes I wish I could be fat and have a fat girlfriend. We could play games together like "Hide The Food On My Body."

"Find the chocolate covered strawberry!"

"I found it, it was under your third flap! Now it's just a regular squashed strawberry."

Here is a picture of a random fatty boomsticks. With my head on this body, I could be the same person if I was this fat and wore glasses.

My parents gave me the sex-talk when I was 24. Mum said, "Dane, if you ever have sex, I'll kill you."  I'm still here.  I don't care how jealous she gets. My body is mine and I will share it with anyone I want to. Is there a male equivalent for cougars?  I want to be a male cougar.  I also want to be a big fatty.

Is it too late to make resolutions?

Confused,

- Dane.